


one day at a time

by FunAndWhimsy



Series: another day [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Anxiety, Asexual Matt Holt, Autistic Keith (Voltron), F/M, Forgiveness, Getting Together, Heart-to-Heart, Insecure Lance, Kidfic, M/M, Protective Keith (Voltron), Reunion Sex, Space Pirate Paladins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-03
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-09-06 01:19:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16822258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FunAndWhimsy/pseuds/FunAndWhimsy
Summary: A collection of short pieces in theanother dayuniverse that didn't fit anywhere else. Some are finished but shorter than I want to post on their own, some are complete scenes from a planned sequel that didn't pan out, some are incomplete but contain stuff I'm fond of.Only Chapter 3 (Pidge/Shiro) is explicit.





	1. Rescuing Matt

Matt shouldn't even be here, but the rebellion is stretched thin enough as it is and this is his own fault so he couldn't really argue when Te-Osh asked him to stay on the ship while she set up his false grave. If any bounty hunters chased them here, though, he's a sitting duck, and Te-Osh is in comms range but she wouldn't be able to get here in time to be any help. 

But this is why you don't take off your fucking mask when you're hacking in to some Galran commander's files, even if it doesn't fit right and you can't see very well. Facial recognition is a bitch. He's lucky the rebels need him - need anyone and everyone they can get - or they might've just flown him out to some backwater planet and left him stranded so he wouldn't lead the bounty hunters on his tail to anything important.

Faking his own death is pretty cool, too, even if he's not looking forward to laying low at a listening station for Zedlir knows how long. It's dashing-space-hero dramatic even if he's always kind of preferred a more loose-canon science officer kind of thing. Te-Osh looks at him like the translators have broken whenever he talks like that, though, and then he misses Katie so hard he can't breathe for a few quintants because no one's ever understood him like she does. But he can't go home as long as he can help fight this war, and definitely not know that he's being chased. Mom and Katie are safe and missing them is a small price to pay.

The comm crackles to life. "Nova, come in."

"I'm here."

"A band of pirates just showed up," Te-Osh says, calm as she always is.

"Want backup?"

"They don't seem hostile," she says. "But they say they have your brother?"

Matt frowns. "I don't have a brother."

There's a long pause, long enough for Matt to get good and anxious, because this feels like a pretty classic trap and he might have just sprung it on Te-Osh by not playing along. 

"Pidge? They work with Pidge, and they need your help with something." She says, and then lower, quieter, "I can handle them. Get to the listening post, but don't go straight there."

How do they know his nickname for Katie? There's no way they should know that if they don't even know he has a sister. Do they - are they trying to throw him off balance? A few things right, a few things wrong, drag him in by making him wonder just what they really know? Matt's no good at this subterfuge shit. Secret codes, yeah, mind games, no way. Would they - Zedlir, did they find his dad? Did bounty hunters find his fucking dad, and did they hurt him, and are they going to hurt Katie?

"No," Matt says, opens the ship door and holds his quarterstaff at the ready. It helps him keep his balance so he can rush through the massive graveyard without being as careful about his footing as he maybe should be. He skids to a stop when he sees Te-Osh, next to the half-programmed grave, and a semicircle of shitty, bedraggled pirates. One of them pulls his mask down, throws his hood back, and he - he looks familiar. Kind of like - what was his name, Shiro's little prodigy? 

"Keith?" 

Keith blinks a little, surprised. "Yeah. How do you - "

"You were always doing homework at Shiro's. What are you _doing_ here?"

He rubs the back of his neck. "It's kind of a long story. Uh, Shiro escaped and got back to Earth, and then we found part of - do you know Voltron? We found one of the lions, and it kind of flew us into space and we found the rest of Voltron and now we're Voltron."

Even Te-Osh's eyes go wide at that, and she's impossible to impress. Have they heard of Voltron, what a question.

"Shiro's alive? And he got out? Thank fuck. And Pidge is with you?"

Keith exchanges a significant look with the others, still wearing their masks and hoods and goggles and whatever. That's not a good look.

"Shiro and Pidge were abducted," the biggest one says, muffled in the scarf wrapped in layers around his mouth and nose. "You turned up in some footage when we ran facial recognition on a Galra database, and we - well, honestly we thought you were him, so we came after you, and - "

"Wait," Matt says; he hasn't heard anything since 'abducted' and all the blood in his body is busy rushing to his feet and his legs are threatening to give out. A hand lands on his shoulder, grip tight enough to keep him mostly steady. Te-Osh is so great, so, so great. "Abducted? How long ago?"

"Uh," Keith says, to the ground instead of Matt. "Six phoebs?"

"Almost seven," one of the masked paladins says, in a soft, accented voice. She sounds like she's trying to be soothing, or maybe that's just how she always sounds because it doesn't make Matt want to start yelling about how he's perfectly calm.

"Seven," he says, flat. His brain is shutting down; he can't really process learning that Pidge made it out here and that she's missing and that she's been missing for over half a year. Maybe - maybe. "Are you sure it's my Pidge?"

"I told you, we found you with facial recognition using his picture," the big one says. "If you're not related it's a pretty huge coincidence."

"I just - you said you had my brother. Pidge isn't my brother."

Keith rubs at the back of his neck, finally looks back up at Matt again. "Look, we're not trying to trick you, or fuck with you, or bring you into a trap. We stayed on your trail because Pidge wanted to find you so much we couldn't just ignore it, and because you should know what's going on with him. You should help us look."

"No," Matt says, "I trust you, I do. I'm just a little confused, though. I - Pidge isn't her name, it's Katie. You - she's my sister."

"What?" All of them - or at least most of them - shout in unison.

"I mean, when I left, she was, I guess she - he - could be - "

"Uh, no," the big one says, finally unwraps the big scarf and pushes up his goggles so Matt can hear him clearly, see his face. "You guys know how I read her diary that one time?"

"You _what_?" Matt asks, but they ignore him. One of the tall, skinny ones yanks his hood off to glare at the big one.

"Were you planning on telling us?"

"Dude, no. She didn't want us to know, I respect her privacy."

Keith turns to join the skinny one in glaring at the big one. "I don't think you know what that means."

"She's young!" the big one says, holding his hands up. "I wanted to see where her head was at, we did kind of drag her to space and get her into this mess."

"Dude."

"Dude."

"Stop!" Matt shouts, and thank fuck they listen to him. Who _are_ these people who brought Pidge and Shiro out here, where it's so dangerous, and haven't found them in seven fucking phoebs, and who have the audacity to read her diary and _still_ not know who she is? Shiro adores Keith, and Matt wants to trust him, but this - 

"You're not safe here," Te-Osh says, knocks him out of his impending breakdown. "We need to move on."

"Come with us," Keith says. "Whatever you're hiding from, you'll be safe at the Castle, and we can catch you up on everything. And if you don't want to stay after, I'll get you back to wherever it is you're going."

Matt glances at Te-Osh, and the band of space pirate paladins, and Te-Osh again, and sighs.

"Okay," he says. "But I want answers."

"Hopefully we'll have them for you," Keith says.

"I'll contact you as soon as I can," Matt says to Te-Osh. "And, hey, maybe they'll solve my problem for me."

"Watch your back," she says, and pulls him into a hug. "I've never seen you want to do anything and not be able to do it. You'll find her."

"Yeah," Matt says, tries hard to believe her. Seven phoebs, though, and even if whoever took them wasn't kidnapping paladins of Voltron on purpose he knows how Galra treat human prisoners. Knows really, really well. Keith and his crew have to know how hopeless it is at this point, but denial's powerful. Or, shit, maybe they don't and Matt's going to have to be the one to tell them. He squeezes his eyes shut, takes a breath, and steps away from Te-Osh to follow the others to their lions.


	2. Babysitting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance helps out.

"Goodness," Allura says, before Lance can say anything. "What's that smell?"

"Eau de Lance," he says, and winks. "I dunno, I was helping Hunk cook and I cut up like fifty of those stinky onion things and it takes like six showers to get the smell off."

"They're so good, though," Allura says, and looks back to Pidge lying on the exam table. Now that he's not focusing on how pretty Allura is or how much he loves her smile when she first sees him or how cute she is cuddling that baby, he can see Pidge isn't wearing anything and he covers his eyes.

"Sorry," he says. "I can come back?"

"It's fine," Pidge says. "I don't really - it's fine."

Lance slowly lowers his hand, watches Allura for hints like she knows any better than he does where Pidge's boundaries are right now. She doesn't seem bothered, or ask him to leave or turn around or keep his eyes closed, so he shrugs and keeps on keepin' on. Pidge has...a lot of scars now. Like, a lot. He tries not to stare, or bring them up, but his eyes keep drifting back; the part of his brain that did a pretty good job not dreaming up specifics while they were imprisoned is having to really work for that now.

"Did you want something?" Allura asks, raising one eyebrow.

"Oh," Lance says, "yeah. I wanted to see if you needed any help with the baby, I'm pretty good with babies."

"Really?" Pidge asks; he wouldn't blame her for being suspicious, but she's really just got that _oh shit a new source of knowledge, consume immediately_ look in her eyes. 

"I've got a ton of nieces and nephews and little cousins and my older cousins' kids. As soon as you can walk, talk, and hold ten pounds in my family you learn to babysit."

"Perfect," Allura says, and Pidge scowls at her. "So Lance can take her for a few days, and I can sedate you so you get some rest."

"I don't want a sedative," Pidge says. "No drugs."

"I can hit you real hard in the back of the head," Lance says. "That'll put you out without a sedative."

"I'd like to see you try," she says, and grins, and quiznak it's good to see that dumb grin again.

"I could give you a shot, it would put you right out without that drugged feeling some - "

" _No_ ," Pidge says, her whole body tensed up so tight it looks like she might break in two. Thinking of her as a kid feels kind of insulting, with everything she's been through, and she's not much younger than he is, but...poor kid. 

"Coran has sleeping potions," Lance says, and Allura rolls her eyes so hard her whole head explodes.

"It's _tea_ ," she says. "It's not magical, there's just a compound in that particular blend that relaxes Alteans and apparently knocks humans out cold."

Pidge glances between them, and sighs. "I could do tea, I think."

"You know I don't want to make you uncomfortable, right?" Allura asks, resting a hand on Pidge's thigh. "It's just, you're not injured so a medical pod would spit you right back out, but you're clearly exhausted and need some good, restorative sleep."

"I know," Pidge says. Allura smiles at her, one of her pretty soft smiles, and squeezes Pidge's thigh. Lance isn't sure how, though, since Pidge's arms and legs look like they've been sculpted out of marble. Shiro's probably ascended to some entirely new level of metaphor, if he was keeping up with her. 

"I'll want to take a sample of your breast milk," she says. "We should be able to synthesize a nearly-identical formula so we won't have to wake you up for feedings."

"Take it all," Pidge says, "I haven't fed her for hours, my tits are killing me."

"Quiznak, I missed you," Lance says; both of them look at him with matching skeptical faces, and that's just way too cute. He shrugs. "You just sounded a lot like you, right then."

Pidge and Allura share a look - a fond one, he's pretty sure, probably - and Allura turns to him.

"Here," she says, and hands the baby over. "Why don't you take her and go make Pidge some tea, and then you won't have to resist making jokes while Pidge and I talk about her breasts."

"Wow, Princess," Lance says. "You really get me, you know?"

"Goodbye, Lance," she says, urging him out the door.

"I missed you too, loser," Pidge says, just before the door closes. Lance beams at the baby, who blinks up at him with soft, gray eyes. Lance wiggles his fingers for her, but she's not really old enough to react much. Still cute, though. He can't smell the top of her head like he does every time someone hands him a baby this small, because his hands still stink, but just thinking about it makes him all warm and fuzzy. And homesick, but everything does that. Lance boops her nose, grins at her again, and heads for the kitchen.

It's a bigger mess than when he left, but Hunk seems calmer; Lance kind of wishes he had something that worked as well for him as cooking does for Hunk. He meditates, he gives himself little spa days, he takes Red out and runs agility trials through asteroid fields, he spends hours at target practice in the training deck, but any of those might leave him more agitated than he started. Give Hunk twenty quintants with a bowl and spoon and some stuff to mix together and he can work himself down from any mood.

"Mission accomplished," he says, and Hunk glances up, smiles when he sees the baby. She probably has magic calming powers, too. "She's mine now, Allura gave her to me."

"Does she have that authority?"

"Well, Shiro's in a healing pod so he can't argue, and when I left she was about to sedate Pidge, so _she_ can't argue. and I'm pretty sure finders-keepers kicks in after, like, a varga."

"Can't argue with that logic," Hunk says, and goes back to concentrating on making whatever tasty little packets of stuff he's wrapping so carefully. Food always tastes better when it's in a crispy little fried packet. "Did you get her name?"

Whoops. "Uh, no. I _assume_ they named her after the coolest person they know."

"Allura?"

"Wow," Lance says. "Wow, that cuts me deep."

"Oh," Hunk says. "Of course you meant you, how silly of me. So, Lancette?"

"Lance can be gender neutral."

"We need some way to differentiate the two of you. How about Cute Lance and Other Lance?"

"Hm," Lance says, tilts his head. "I don't think that would be good for her self-esteem."

Lance is saved from any evidence that Hunk doesn't find every single word out of his mouth charming by Coran, who makes it about half a step into the kitchen before he sees the baby and starts wildly contorting his face for her. Alteans are pretty good at wacky faces, wow.

"I'm five quintants away from kicking everyone who isn't helping out of my kitchen," Hunk says. "Fair warning."

"Won't be but a tick," Coran says, and finally looks up from baby not-Lance's completely impassive face. "Allura's sending me off on a supply run, and I need you to write down everything the little one might need. In some detail, of course, since I doubt I'll find much for human babies and I'll need to improvise."

"Sure," Lance says, already trying to figure out how to make it clear he wants Coran to find onesies with too many arms so they can stuff the arms and take pictures like she's a mutant baby. Actually probably if he just says that Coran'll go for it, he's probably a cute weird baby photoshoot kind of guy. Lance compromises and notes down how many limbs humans have - as if Coran needs a reminder - and then doodles a baby with two human arms and four fake stuffed arms, a little caterpillar, and he's pretty sure Coran will recognize his vision and bring it to life. The problem is, when he's done that, he has to actually think about everything an infant needs, especially an infant on a spaceship, and if he forgets something or explains it wrong it's another half-dobosh trip for Coran to leave them without a helmsman. 

"Er," Coran says, while Lance is trying to figure out how many playpens are necessary. Two or three, maybe, it's a big ship and they won't want to keep moving one around all the time. Or none, what's he thinking, she won't be big enough for that for phoebs. "Should I come back?"

"No," Hunk says, from closer than Lance expected, and there's a warm, steadying hand on his back. "Relax, dude."

Lance laughs a little, 'cause he loves that Hunk knows when he's freaking out but hates looking like he's freaking out. "Just trying to be comprehensive."

"I know. How about you do the really essential stuff right now, and we can plan a bigger supply run once you've had time to think about it?"

"Oh," Lance says. "Obviously. Sending it to your gauntlet now, Coran."

Coran salutes, and just like he promised Hunk he hurries out of the kitchen. Hunk squeezes Lance's shoulder again, and goes back to his cooking, leaves Lance to wiggle his fingers for the baby and try not to worry too much. Pidge kept her alive and healthy in a Galra prison with basically nothing for a whole phoeb, she'll be okay if Coran can't find the right bottles or Lance forgot something. It's - this is all he can do, though, he's not Keith or Matt so he can't just plaster himself to Pidge and Shiro in case they need anything, he's not Allura healing them up or doing science stuff to make things easier. He's for sure not Hunk; anyone can hand out hugs and plates of food but Hunk has special soothing powers. Lance is a decent hugger but he's not some kind of wizard with feel-better magic.

"You okay?" Hunk asks, over the sizzle of tasty little packets in a deep fryer. 

"Sure."

"Really? You're barely bothering me at all."

"I'm bothering Lance instead. And, y'know, it's been kind of a long day."

"Kind of," Hunk says, with a little laugh that's not really a laugh at all. "You know you can talk to me whenever, yeah?"

"Yeah," Lance says, tries to focus on the baby and not on how he shouldn't be making Hunk worry, or all the things he couldn't do before and can't do now. "I know."


	3. Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro finally heals and comes out of his medical pod. Explicit.

Pidge should feel worse than she does that Keith isn't here; she feels bad for the _why_ , almost told Allura not to make him leave for a nap just because he lied about how much he was sleeping and collapsed a little bit. Keith went without Shiro for longer than she did, Keith worked so hard to get them rescued, Keith deserves some alone time with Shiro like Pidge has had with Matt, but Pidge is glad she's the first person he'll see when the pod opens. She hasn't been able to thank him for Haxus, yet, or scold him for it, and she still doesn't know which she'll do.

The door slides open, and Shiro coughs a few times before stumbling out. Allura steadies him with a strong arm but he doesn't turn to look at her; he's staring at Pidge, with his eyes all soft and warm and relieved. His arm is still disabled, hanging too heavy at his side, but otherwise he looks good. Great. Better than she's seen him in a long time, clean and healthy, his shaggy hair thick and shiny, and the only visible mark on him is the old scar on his nose. Later, if he'll let her, if they're still - if he'll let her, she'll need to catalog the scars Sendak gave him in this last phoeb of separation.

"I'll need your help with his arm," Allura says; Shiro startles, like he didn't know she was there even though she's holding him up. Allura either doesn't notice or does a really good job of pretending not to. "I know the basic principles but I can't make sense of the code."

"Yeah," Pidge says, watching Shiro walk towards her, can't tear her eyes away long enough to look at Allura. "I'll take care of him."

Allura steps away from his side just before he reaches Pidge, backs up so she's well out of the way when Pidge goes up on her toes to throw her arms around his neck and he wraps her up in a backbreaking hug. He's so warm and solid and doesn't smell like himself - kind of sterile, actually - but he's here, and he's okay, and they both made it. 

"I'll give you some time," Allura says; Pidge isn't sure her muffled _thank you_ is audible but she's not going to move away from Shiro even a little bit so it doesn't matter. Soft footsteps get quieter and quieter and then the door opens and closes and they're alone together, finally.

"You shouldn't have," Pidge says, closer to crying than she wants to be but farther than she expected. "You're so stupid, you shouldn't - "

"I'd do it again," Shiro says, slides his arms around to her waist so he can hoist her up on a table and then remembers he only has one working arm. Pidge hops up herself, smiles at him, and she's tall enough now he can look her in the eye. Pidge wraps her legs around him almost automatically, and tightens her arms around his neck; she's never going to let him go, ever. "I'm sorry I didn't do it sooner."

"Your leg was broken in six places, Shiro. _Six_."

"It's fine now," he says, and kisses her before she can yell at him, because he knows her too well. The press of his lips against hers is still so calming, makes her feel safe, settled, like at least something is how it's supposed to be, his lips and his arm around her and the solid bulk of him caged in her arms and legs; she shouldn't need this, now, to feel safe, not in the Castle, not with all the paladins to protect her, but it settles her all the same.

Pidge loses all track of time but when Shiro finally pulls back, to nuzzle and nibble at her lips before he finally manages to pull all the way away.

"Where is she?" he asks.

"Lance has her, last I knew," she says. "He's good with her."

"Big family," Shiro says.

"Yeah," Pidge says, "but also just, you know, his general Lance-ness."

Shiro kisses her again, soft and quick. "I thought of a name."

"Is it better than Matt Voltron Champion Jr.? Or Lance?"

"Lance?"

"He had to call her _something_ when we were both out, and apparently Hunk didn't even try to talk him out of it."

Shiro laughs, a soft little chuckle, and her heart flips over; she loves it when he laughs, loves it when he's happy, when he's okay, when he's alive and well and in her arms.

"Hatoko," he says, low, almost a whisper.

"Pretty," she says. "You were - when we first got here that was all you could say."

"I talk to myself when I've been alone too long," he says. "And Sendak had a rule about me saying your name, all the guards on my rotation were supposed to break something if they heard it. So I had to start thinking of you as someone else, and I - my head was a mess, I was forgetting things I knew I knew, and I couldn't remember Katie, so - Hatoko."

He nuzzles her lips again, kisses her good and deep and breathtaking before pulling away again. He's going to kill her at this rate.

"What - "

"Little bird," he says, even softer, like a secret. "My little bird. Little birds, the two of you"

"Shiro," she says, can't say anything else, can't think of anything else, so overwhelmed she can barely breathe and then he kisses her again, deeper, desperate and frantic, holding her so close it feels like she might bruise all the places they're pressed together. Fine, good, great; it's been too long since she's had a bruise from Shiro. She buries her fingers in his hair and kisses him back like he's her only source of air, like she'll die without him, because she might have died without him, and when she squeezes her legs around his waist he groans. He's hard; she's not used to feeling his stiff cock through his suit like this, not when he isn't the Champion, isn't fresh from a fight.

"I need you," he says, low and rough against her lips, and she's got his zipper halfway down before she remembers to ask if he's okay taking his clothes off. He starts shrugging out of it when she pauses, so she unzips him the rest of the way quick, tries to keep him from getting tangled. It takes both of them to get the skintight material down and off his metal arm, both of them so frantic they keep getting in each other's way, but soon enough his suit is around his thighs and Pidge can look at him, really look. There are new scars, not a lot but they all look pretty nasty, and he's a little underfed, but he's warm and alive and breathing and _beautiful_.

It only takes a tick or two for Pidge to squirm out of her pajama pants, and the moment they drop to the floor Shiro's pressed up against her again, rutting his cock against her cunt while she wraps her legs back around him. He feels good, so good, she tried so hard not to let herself miss this so she didn't break down and now it's all hitting her in a rush. Shiro's cock slips in the wetness of her, parts her lips and slides against her clit and finally, God, finally pushes inside. 

Shiro doesn't give her any time to adjust before he starts fucking her in earnest; she didn't want it, anyway, wants to feel him stretch her open, force her body to make way for him. He fucks her so hard all she can do is moan, one endless overwhelmed noise broken up as he knocks the breath out of her. The table's shaking, and she has to let go of him to lean back and brace herself. The new angle is good, better, she yelps the next time he pushes in and he grins, handsome and cocky, swivels his hips in tighter, more controlled movements so the head of his cock just bumps up against all the best places inside her, over and over.

"I'm - ooh, oh, please, Shiro, please," she whines, and he leans over her, plants his good hand on the table over her so he can fuck her harder.

"Can you come like this?" 

Pidge almost says no but he's grinding his cock into her sweet spot with so much precision, devotion, she's warm all over, on fire everywhere, and as touch-starved as she is, as desperate as she is, she's already hurtling towards the edge.

"Yeah," she gasps, "yeah, right - fuck don't stop, don't stop." 

Shiro fucks her so hard she can't catch her breath, perfect cock and perfect body and the heat of him over her and inside of her and all around her, and her cunt spasms so hard it hurts and she's coming for him, in a hot wet rush that leaves his salt-and-pepper pubic hair drenched, that takes everything, everything out of her so all she can do is collapse flat on her back. Shiro gives her a quintant, always so considerate, but as soon as he starts fucking into her again she has a moment of clarity.

"Don't, don't," she starts, and Shiro pulls out of her so quickly it takes her breath away, takes a step back so he's not touching her, he's so good he's always so good. Pidge manages to push herself back up on shaky arms so she can look at him. "Sorry, I just - not inside."

"Right," he says, sweating and breathing hard and watching her so carefully. "I'll just - "

Pidge slides off the table before he can finish, lands on her knees in front of him, and sucks the head of his cock into her mouth before he knows what's happening. Shiro gasps and groans, knees buckling a little bit before he steadies himself. It never gets old, affecting him like this; Pidge hollows her cheeks, sucking hard, his cock filthy with her come and she aches for the taste of his, the salty musky blend of the two of them. He rocks his hips, just a little, thighs tense with the strain, and Pidge bobs her head quick, aims for the same rhythm he fucks her mouth with when he's out of control, and it's not long before his hips jerk and he gasps her name and comes thick and hot down her throat, so much she can't swallow it all.

"Fuck," he says, panting, as Pidge grabs on to the table and pulls herself up to stand next to him. He tugs her in for another kiss, groans at the taste of both of them on her lips, and when he pulls away he tips his forehead against hers. "I want to see her."

"Yeah," Pidge says, "of course. Go find Keith, I'll clean up a little and bring her to you."

"I don't know, maybe you should walk around like this," Shiro says, swipes his thumb through the come on her chin. "I - fuck I'm glad you're okay."

"Yeah," Pidge says. "You - I told Keith he might - I was worried you were - "

"He wouldn't have."

Pidge just nods and helps him back into his suit, as gentle as she can be with his Galra arm. She'd like to fix it for him now, but probably the best thing for him is to cuddle up with Keith and the baby - Keith and Hatoko - for a little while. There's a sheet on the exam table; Pidge pulls it off and rips a long piece so she can bind Shiro's arm up in a makeshift sling.

"Better?'

"Yeah," he says, kisses her forehead. "Thanks."


	4. Cold Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pidge and Shiro have an important talk. Pidge and Keith don't.

The room is dark when the door slides open for Pidge; Shiro's sitting on the bed, Hatoko cradled in his arm, Keith asleep with his head in Shiro's lap. He looks better than when Allura had Hunk drag him out of the medical bay; not any less tired, not yet, but less like he's going to shake right out of his skin with anxiety. Almost peaceful, even.

"You're not worried about waking him up?"

"I don't think a full-scale attack on the Castle would wake him up right now."

"Matt's been asleep for almost a full dobosh," Pidge says, sets her bundle of equipment at the foot of the bed so she can clear off Keith's nightstand. Shiro watches her while she sets up, dark eyes flicking back and forth across the room while she plugs things in and finds a chair and opens the access panel on his arm to start hooking him up to her terminal. He watches her like he needs to know where she is at all times to keep her safe, like he's done for so long, and instead of wanting to snap at him like she has the other paladins since she woke up she just lets it warm her. "I didn't let myself think about them for so long, because I'd get angry, and I didn't want to be angry. And I was a little worried once I saw everyone I wouldn't be able to not be angry. And I am, sometimes, but - I mean, just look at him."

Shiro does, for a tick, eyes flicking away from Pidge and his whole face going soft, and just as soft when he looks back at her.

"You be angry about whatever you need to be," he says. "You - we - have a lot to be angry about. Like, I want you to tell me which one of them killed Sendak, so I can make them a cake, but I don't because I don't think I can control how upset I am that it wasn't me."

Pidge glances at Hatoko, her gray eyes bright and alert in the dark, because she hasn't wanted to be the one to say this, can't say it to Shiro's face. "Sendak's alive," she says. "He escaped."

"Oh," Shiro says, and she makes herself meet his eyes, take in the weird blend of disappointment and relief and fear and fury in his eyes, the thin, tight line of his lips, the set of his jaw. She'd yelled at Hunk when he told her, horrible things, pounded her fists against his chest and called him a failure and then cried on him for what felt like forever, and he just held her through it because Hunk is the best person she knows. 

"So," Pidge says, a little too bright, too sharp, ready to change the subject. "Hypothetically, there's, like, one perfect setting for your arm, where it weighs the same as your other one, and is strong enough to be your main weapon, and doesn't tire you out more than using your human arm to fight does. Ideally I'd find a way to set it there and kind of...lock it? So it can only be changed by you, or anyone you specifically want to have access, and the settings would just be 'off' and 'on'. No one cranking it up and exhausting you from the quintessence drain, no one turning it down to try and make you feel helpless."

"Whatever you think is best."

"I mean, it's your body, you can - "

"When we all slept at Keith's place that first night, after you guys rescued me, I woke up from a nightmare just in time to watch myself light up my hand and punch a hole in his wall. I'd rather keep it off than risk doing that to you, or Hatoko, or anyone else."

"Okay," Pidge says, tries to smile reassuringly at him but she's pretty sure she doesn't succeed. "I can see if there's a way to turn off just the weaponized hand, so you can still function and the heaviness won't wreck your back."

"You think you can do that?"

"I know you're a little sleepy from the medical pod but you _do_ know who you're talking to, right?"

Shiro laughs, a little hollow but it's still a real, actual laugh; the baby coos and Shiro's eyes go so wide and adoring Pidge's heart squeezes up in her chest. She loves him, she's in love with him, so much it hurts to look at him sometimes and she's terrified of what they are when they're not each other's only source of comfort, when they aren't in such a fucked-up situation, but right now, here, it's less scary.

"You mentioned - I wasn't sure if - you're worried about hurting me in my sleep?" Everything she's been through, they've been through, all the ways he's seen her and all the ways she's seen him and she can't ask a simple question about sleeping arrangements. Pidge hunches over a little, focuses on typing so she doesn't have to see however he's looking at her.

"I assumed we'd be sleeping together, with the baby," he says. "And honestly I'm not sure I _can_ fall asleep without you."

"Oh," Pidge says. Obviously. "Of course."

"Do you not want to? I won't push."

"No," she says, "that's not - I just wasn't sure if you wanted, or felt obligated, or if it was just like 'this is how it has been' habit, or - "

"I think we need to be careful," he says, a little too gently, and she sighs and looks up from the screen. "It would be so easy to get stuck where we are, because it's easy and safe and comfortable when we're together and as long as we have that we don't have to put the work in to learn how to be people again. I need to figure out who Shiro is, now, and you probably need to do the same for yourself. But I don't think careful means avoiding each other, and I'd really - I want to see what this is, when we're people again. As long as you do."

"I - yeah," Pidge says, can feel herself blushing, hopes it isn't too obvious in the glow from the terminal. It's not like Shiro hasn't seen worse from her. "I'm about to turn your arm on."

"This part is always weird," Shiro says, and screws up his face a little a half-tick after Pidge taps the screen.

"Weirder than when it goes dead?"

"Oh yeah. Then it's like, oh, right, this was just a hunk of metal the whole time. Which is weird, I guess, but when it turns on it's all oh, wow, I have a normal arm now. And my shoulder gets all buzzy and weird."

"Huh," Pidge says. "How's it feel?"

Shiro raises his arm over his head, stretches it out to the side (and ruffles her hair with a little lopsided smile), out in front of him, and then tickles Hatoko with it while she squirms and makes tiny adorable baby noises. 

"Great."

"Okay, I'll lock it there for now. And I'll work on the hand thing, if I don't have it ready before bed tonight I can just turn you off."

"You could never," he says, and winks, and he looks so proud of himself when Pidge rolls her eyes she does it again just to make him laugh. Pidge shuts down the terminal and starts packing up; Shiro watches her while she does it, same as when she set up, and it still just makes her feel soft and warm and safe. She leans in to kiss him once she's replaced everything Keith had on his nightstand, and he nips at her lips a little when she pulls away. He's just so _cute_ , ugh.

"I'm gonna go put this somewhere," she says, "and then I'm coming back to steal the baby."

"You absolutely are _not_."

"I have to feed her."

"Do it here."

"I'm not getting my tits out in Keith's room."

"Wow," Keith says, sleepy and half-muffled in Shiro's leg. "That's the saddest sentence I've ever heard."

"See what you did?" Shiro says. "You woke the other baby. Ow."

"Lot more pinches where that came from. Give Pidge the baby, she'll bring her right back. And you promised me you'd try to sleep."

"I did try."

"Try again," Pidge says, and Keith looks up like he's only just realized she's there. There's something in his eyes that makes her want to shiver a little bit, a distant - really distant - shadow of the way Sendak would look at her sometimes. Not cruel, not exactly jealous, but possessive, and protective, and like she's doing something wrong getting too close to Shiro. Of course he'd look at her like that; she deserves it, probably, and at the very least she expected it. It's okay, it's okay, it'll be okay. 

Pidge leans in to kiss Shiro before she leaves, because he's already leaning towards her for it, and doesn't wonder if Keith is scowling about it. That's probably not giving him enough credit; he doesn't _hate_ her, probably. She's slow to come back, takes her time bringing her stuff all the way back to the lab and setting it up so it'll be ready the next time she wants to work, takes the long way back to Keith's room. Shiro's asleep when she finally gets back, almost a perfect mirror of Keith from earlier, and now Keith's sitting up holding the baby, a little stiff, a little awkward. His eyes aren't quite so hard to look at anymore, and he gives Pidge a small, soft smile when he holds Hatoko out to her.

"I'm glad you're okay," he says, so quiet she barely hears it.

"I - yeah," she says. "Me, too."

Keith smirks a little, and for a tick it feels like she's talking to Keith again, just Keith who she'd started getting along with so well and not Shiro's other protector. Not that talking to someone else who wants to take care of Shiro should be hard, just - just. Her head's a little bit of a mess right now.

"She's cute," Keith whispers, as he hands her over. "I can't believe you - "

"Yeah," Pidge says again, cuts him off because she can't listen to the rest of it, not now, not when thinking of what she survived just makes her think of how real Hatoko is, how Pidge can't ever, ever escape what happened to her. She just tucks Hatoko close to her chest, breathes in that weird good baby smell, and tries to smile at Keith before she leaves the two of them alone.


	5. Getting Somewhere

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hunk, and Keith, and a long-overdue beginning.

Hunk's about three hundred pages deep in the doorstop fantasy novel Pidge brought to space along with all the other debris of her life she had stuffed in her backpack that night when the console on the wall beeps to let him know someone's at the door. It's too late for anyone to be here unless it's an emergency, or it's Keith, and if it's an emergency the alarm would be blaring. Hunk scrambles for his makeshift bookmark and almost falls on the floor in his hurry to roll out of bed; it's kind of been a while since they've had any alone time.

"Hey," Keith says, a little smirk on his tired face like he heard Hunk crashing around in his eagerness. The rooms are soundproof, but Hunk wouldn't really be surprised if he had.

"Wanna come in?"

Hunk's already moving back from the door as he asks, and Keith's already across the threshold when he nods. Hunk still doesn't really know how to handle having a cute boy in his bedroom, other than offering him a seat on the bed and trying not to get too distracted by how pretty he is. That part's hard.

"I feel like I should apologize," Keith says.

"For?"

"I've seen you less in the last two weeks than when I'm off with the Marmora," he says. "And we finally got to talk, and I just - "

"Dude," Hunk says, sits next to him on the bed. "You don't have to be sorry for spending all your time with Shiro. He needs you, you need him, it's fine."

"People keep saying that."

"What, that things are fine?"

"Yeah," Keith says. "I don't like this game."

Hunk frowns. "I'm not playing a game with you, Keith. I was surprised you didn't want to wait until things settled down to make time for this, so I'm not exactly surprised you don't actually have the time right now. I'm patient."

"Not you," Keith says, scoots back against the wall and draws his knees up to his chest; he looks more vulnerable than Hunk's maybe ever seen him, including every late night he had to track Keith down and drag him to a bed, like closing himself up just reminds Hunk how soft he can be and how much he needs to protect that. "Not just you. It's Shiro, and Pidge, and - I've been trying to pick a fight with Lance all dobosh, blow off some steam, and he's being _gentle_ with me. No one's acting right, no one's making sense, and I can't figure out the new rules."

Hunk turns so he can look at Keith better, tries not to crowd him but gets close enough he can reach out and rest his hand on Keith's knee. Keith doesn't flinch, or move away, or glare at him, so he keeps it there, and tries not to get distracted by how big his hand is, how slim Keith's legs are. How good it's going to be, someday, when he can do better than a single point of contact to take Keith out of his head. Keith's drumming his fingers against the bed, so Hunk stretches with his free hand to grab the cool space rock he keeps on his bedside table and hand it to him. There's nothing cool about it, Hunk just thought it was glowing when he first spotted it but it had just been Lance with a flashlight looking for something he dropped. It settles Keith, though, as far as Hunk can tell, to roll it around in his hands and rub his thumb over all the worn grooves, so he's glad he kept it.

"I think there might not be any rules for a while," he says. "I know that sucks for you, but I can try to help? Pidge and Shiro are going to keep saying everything's fine, in between flashbacks and nightmares and panic attacks and meltdowns, because everything that isn't those things probably does feel fine. I think they're trying to protect us, or they can't handle how _big_ what they went through was and their brains are protecting them. I mean, I've seen Pidge fling herself on the ground and moan about dying when she looked at a screen too long and gave herself a little headache, it's fucking weird to see her staring off into space with her eyes all teary and have her tell me nothing's wrong, but I have to trust she isn't lying."

"I don't think they're lying, I just don't - they aren't fine, nothing's fine."

"Like I said, this is just gonna suck for you for a little bit, dude. They're gonna be weird and unpredictable for a while, and we just kind of have to do what we can to give them space to even out again. And you can always come here if it's making you anxious, you know that. Even if I'm not around you can escape, or whatever."

Keith smiles at him, such a rare thing even as small and weak as it is (more of a quirk of his lips than anything), and his eyes are a little soft the way Hunk wants to think only he gets to see, and the acrobatics his heart starts doing in his chest are ridiculous. Keith's fucking _pretty_ , okay, and Hunk knows him well enough to know it's a big deal Keith can talk like this to him. 

"I do, yeah."

"And Lance is kind of a disaster, but you know that. He really wants to help and he's not thinking about anything else. If he fights with you like always it might upset Shiro, and that's not helping, so he can't do it. Hate to say it, but you might have to use your words with him for a little bit."

"Gross."

"I know. You don't have to spill all your shit to him, though, you just have to ask him to spar instead of goading."

Keith sighs; Hunk watches him fiddle with the rock, distracted by his long fingers and how quick they move. He never gets like this, frustrated and horny so he can't be around someone he's into without thinking about how they'd look naked, how they'd taste. That's a Lance thing; Hunk's more straightforward. Keith's a special case, though, in a lot of ways.

"I was gonna talk about us," Keith says. "I swear that's what I came here for."

"Well, I'm deeply offended you didn't," Hunk says, winks at Keith; Keith just frowns.

"What?"

"I mean, I know you don't want me to tell you it's fine."

"You don't - oh," he says. "Fuck you, you're not funny."

"Lance and Pidge think I'm funny."

"Lance and Pidge think fart jokes are funny, dude, get higher standards," Keith says, smiling again, almost a real one that anyone else would recognize as a smile this time. If Shiro wants Black back, Hunk's new job is gonna be following Keith around and bothering him until he smiles, all the time, forever.

"I'd very much like to have that 'us' talk," Hunk says, squeezes Keith's knee. "Like, so much. But there's a lot going on, we're both gonna get distracted. We'll get there."

"You think so?"

"Of course, dude."

Keith nods a little. "Okay. Can I stay here tonight?"

"Pfft," Hunk says, already reaching out to start shuffling his pillows around to make room for Keith. "Like I'd let you go anywhere else."


	6. Confessional

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro knows he needs to talk to Matt. Shiro really, really doesn't want to talk to Matt.

Matt's in the little kitchenette when Shiro wakes up from his nap, and either Shiro doesn't move fast enough or Matt turns at just the right time, and for whatever reason this is the time Matt won't let Shiro make a quiet escape. 

"Shiro," he says, and Shiro could probably pretend not to hear him (it wouldn't be _convincing_ , but it wouldn't matter; Matt wouldn't follow him into his bedroom) but it's way past time for this. Maybe getting it over with will feel better.

"Hey."

"I'm heating up a couple of the hand pie things Hunk brought up," Matt says. "Want one?"

"Uh, yeah," Shiro says. "Or three."

"A growing boy," Matt says, and fills the little baking sheet with pies. Shiro just watches him, carefully arranging pies on the sheet so they all have the same distance between them, fiddling with the fancy oven controls, putting the sheet in on the top rack, then moving it to the bottom, then almost to the top one more time before nodding and leaving it on the bottom. It's been two years and change since the last time Shiro saw Matt being a weird nerd about this but it feels like yesterday. Shiro's heart aches like a bruise. "You've been avoiding me."

"Well, yeah," Shiro says; he hasn't exactly been subtle. "I figure I'm the last person you want to deal with."

"I thought so. You're not, but I get it." Matt's just...just looking at him, calm and placid, his _Adam already told me you had a fight, come on, vent it out_ face and it's not what Shiro expected. 

"I can't even begin to - " he starts, and pauses, because there's already a lump in his throat. The thing about having this talk with Matt is Shiro hasn't even really started letting himself think about all the things he did to Pidge, on his own, no one else to blame, or all the times he should have done what he did with Haxus and kill people rather than let them make him hurt her, or being the reason she got captured in the first place, or - there's so much. "I'm sorry, Matt, I'm so, so sorry."

"Hey," Matt says, soft; Shiro tenses when Matt steps closer - Matt isn't really a hit someone so he feels better guy but if he needs to Shiro'll stand here and take it - but Matt just pulls him into a hug. "I know."

It's the worst thing he could say, because Shiro was all braced for a fight or an _I don't care_ or to be asked to keep staying out of Matt's sight or to stay away from Pidge, not for this, not for kind eyes and a tight hug and Shiro starts crying. Matt squeezes him tighter, pats his back and murmurs reassuring nonsense and Shiro's crying so hard he can't breathe. He never cries, and it's like a dam breaking, everything bursting out of him all at once. He's sobbing, awful choked noises he can't stop, and his nose is running, and he's starting to get a headache just from the force of it and Matt just holds on to him, rocks him side to side a little. 

Shiro feels empty, when he finally calms down, when gasping in air is helping him catch his breath, not just fueling more sobs. Like he cried out everything that's ever been inside of him and now he's just a hollow shell. It's kind of nice, actually; maybe this is why Pidge is so good about crying when she needs to, this almost-peace that's just the absence of everything.

"Come on," Matt says, pulls away a little. "You should sit down."

Shiro lets Matt lead him to the couch, because he cried out all his muscle memory and can barely figure out how to walk. Matt pulls the blanket off the back of the couch, the one Pidge is always cocooned in when she falls asleep out here, and wraps it around his shoulders. It smells like her, stale sweat and too many days without a shower because they've both kind of forgotten how to be clean.

"I've gotta get the food out of the oven," Matt says. "I'll be right back. Want anything?"

"Water, maybe," Shiro says. "And, uh, tissues."

Matt laughs a little and hands over the box of tissues from the coffee table, and then leaves the tiny window of Shiro's awareness right now. This must be how the baby feels, or will feel once she starts recognizing people; it feels like Matt's just disappeared completely, and Shiro's alone. He isn't gone for long, though, and when he comes back he has a plate of hot food and a water pouch.

"We don't have to do this now," Matt says, sitting next to Shiro close enough they're touching all along their sides but not quite enough for it to be a cuddle, or whatever. "I mean, I can do the part where I tell you I don't blame you, and I know you won't listen but you might give yourself a little more time?"

"You don't know half of - "

"And I don't need you to tell me. I'd rather you didn't, if Pidge wants me to know everything she went through she'll tell me, and she's been pretty clear about it so far. I'll take your confession if you need it, but not until you make sure she's okay with me knowing the messy details."

"I - okay," Shiro says. "That's fair."

"I'm sorry," Matt says, "if I've made you feel like this. I don't - I know it wasn't you, that none of it was your fault. I just can't quite make 'I know you'd never hurt her' and 'you hurt her' get along in my head yet. I've tried not to take it out on you, but...I don't know. I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize."

"Neither do you," Matt says, "but I'm letting you because it makes you feel better so cut me some slack."

Shiro sighs, wraps the blanket around himself a little tighter. He's tired, he's always so tired. He grabs one of the meat pies, still too hot to really eat, and nibbles around the edge just to give himself something to do. It's - he's never had to try with Matt, is the thing. Matt sort of tripped into his life and all of a sudden he was Shiro's favorite person other than Adam and it never felt like work the way a lot of people did, the way even Adam did (he was good work, worth doing, but it was still _work_ ). He doesn't know how to be awkward around Adam.

Pidge was the same way; important to him within thirty seconds the way most people aren't after years. It's a Holt thing, maybe, something inherently disarming running through their blood. And Shiro's resented Pidge for that, too, the way he's resenting Matt a little right now, angry at her for getting him to care so much so fast those first weeks in captivity where he could have decided to only care about himself. 

"If it was going to be anyone," Matt says, "I'm glad it was you. I hated - _hated_ \- Hunk and Lance at first, for being the reason she ended up out here, I don't even know how I'd feel if it had been one of them, or someone else I don't know. At least I trust you, you know? And even - I don't trust you any less, knowing. I"m just angry, and it doesn't always go in the right direction."

"It's okay."

"It's not," he says. "But thanks. I need to - I love you, dude, you know I love you, right?"

 _Even now?_ Shiro wants to ask, but Matt'll say yes even if it isn't true so it's not really worth it. Shiro leans into him, as warm and comforting as the blanket, and Matt throws an arm over his shoulders and squeezes tight.and takes a big bite of pie so he can worry about his burnt tongue instead of how to ever, ever fix this.


	7. Life Goes On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith can't keep standing still for Shiro's sake, especially when he knows Shiro wouldn't want that.

Shiro's lifting weights in the training deck, which isn't unusual; the training deck is otherwise empty, this early in the morning, and that's not unusual, either. Hatoko's asleep in her carrier next to the leg press, and he usually leaves her behind so she's there when Pidge wakes up, but it's an often enough thing no one would be surprised to see her there.

This morning, when Shiro got dressed, he dug a tank top and tiny shorts out of the pile of stuff Coran hoarded for them while they were gone, and he walked down to the deck without putting a hoodie and sweats on over them, and he's working out without having conveniently forgotten to take _off_ the hoodie and sweats. That's a lot of exposed skin - exposed scars - and anyone could have been wandering the halls, anyone could come join him in here anytime, and he's finally enough into the rhythm of his workout he doesn't have to actively work on keeping himself calm but it took him a long fucking time to get here.

Shiro's getting his vanity back, a little, which is kind of a double-edged sword and kind of a shitty thing to get back over everything else he lost about himself, but beggars can't be choosers. And it does make this easier, this push to make his body his own again, when he notices - craves - the sheen of sweat on his own thighs, the way Pidge looks at him when he walks around naked, the subtle looks thrown his way when rebels or Marmora are visiting the ship. He used to love how hot he was, used to thrive on it, and it's not his best quality but it's for sure not his worst.

The door at the far end of the room opens, and Shiro's chest tightens a little, shoulders going tense. Forcing whoever it is to look at all the evidence of what's happened to him just so he can wear short sleeves comfortably seems unfair all of a sudden; of course he has the most right to baggage about the last two years of his life, but everyone here has their own stuff about it, and - 

Keith wolf-whistles. "Lookin' good," he says, and when Shiro looks up he winks. "Are those Pidge's clothes?"

"Yeah," Shiro says. "It's a better workout if you cut off your circulation as much as possible."

Keith laughs, and Shiro relaxes, inch by inch. "Good advice."

The baby makes a soft gurgling noise - they must have woken her up - and Keith's face goes all goofy, such a sap for her. Not that Shiro's any better. Keith leans down to wiggle his fingers for her but she's not interested in his games so he just laughs again and steps over her to the console so he can pull up a weight bench for himself, and a training dummy on the other side of the room. He doesn't really do anything with either, though, aside from sitting on the bench and watching Shiro.

"What's up?" Shiro asks.

"I'm going back to the Blades," he says, slowly, like he's telling Shiro someone died and doesn't actually want to say it. "They need me."

"Good," Shiro says. "I mean, I'm glad you've stuck around, and I'll miss you, but you do good work with them."

Keith sighs. "I don't - I'm worried about leaving you alone."

Shiro pushes the weights up one last time, then leans forward to lock the machine in place so he can sit up. There's a good solid ache in his legs, he'll feel this morning all day. "I'm hardly alone."

"You and Pidge have only been able to sleep in the same bed without giving each other nightmares for ten or twelve doboshes. Who'll stay with you if that flares up again?"

"Lance and Hunk have both offered," Shiro says. "And I like being alone better, it might take me longer to get out of it but at least I won't worry about hurting anyone."

"You don't have to worry about hurting me."

Shiro frowns. "I broke your arm."

"Just once, and it took, like, two seconds to heal. I don't - " Keith sighs, runs his hands through his hair. "You have to promise you'll let people take care of you without me here forcing you."

"I will," Shiro says. "I mean, I'll try. I'm working on it."

"I know. And you're doing good, I just - you're going to tell me to trust Pidge to take care of you, and I have to make sure that's not all you're counting on, because I don't - because I know you, and the minute you think she needs something more than you do you'll stop trying."

"You can say you don't trust her." The words stick in Shiro's throat a little, and he leans down to lift Hatoko out of her carrier so Keith can't see his face, but he does mean it. It's not like it's a secret, it's not like he doesn't know; not like he doesn't understand where Keith is coming from, even.

"Not to you." 

"Matt hates me," Shiro says; that sticks in his throat, too. "A part of him does, anyway. I don't think he wants to, I don't think he likes it, but sometimes when he looks at me it's so clear I almost expect him to fight me. And it's awful, but I get it. If I'd been able to stop more of what happened from happening, his sister would be a lot less fucked up right now, and she's his priority. And if Pidge had stopped more stuff from happening, I probably wouldn't be as fucked up as I am right now. Probably."

"It's not that I don't think she wants to take care of you," Keith says. "She was hissing like a wild thing at anyone who went near you when we were trying to get you into a pod, I won't forget that. But you're really fucking good at ignoring your own shit when you can focus on someone else, and Pidge is such an easy target for that right now."

"And I'm working on it," Shiro says. "We're working on it. She's pretty good at telling me no at her own expense, even if you never see it."

Keith frowns, ducks his head and rubs at the back of his neck. "She doesn't - does she know, do you think? I don't want her to think I'm mad at her, or I don't like her, or - "

"If she does, I think she gets it," Shiro says. "You'd have to ask her, but she sleeps with those daggers you got her under her pillow every night so I think you two are okay."

"Good, I still owe Antok like ten thousand favors for finding those."

Pidge's eyes had lit up when Keith held those daggers out for her, not long after a couple Marmora agents reported to the Castle for a briefing, big and amazed and a little - a lot - watery. They're not actual Marmora blades, but they're Luxite, and crafted by someone who apprenticed with the Marmora's blademaster, and such works of art Shiro was half-tempted to suggest they just hang them on the wall in their quarters. She hadn't cried, but she'd come close, and she'd hugged Keith so tight her short arms met at the small of his back, and Coran had spent twenty doboshes going on and on about how rare they were, what an incredible find, all the body parts various beings would probably trade to get their hands on a pair. And Keith had made that face he makes when he lets his soft marshmallow center show, sheepish and pleased and like something inside him had settled, and Shiro swelled up with so much love for him he thought he might burst.

"Everyone's got their shit," he says. "We were gone for a whole deca-phoeb and we've only been back for a phoeb and a half. I'm doing my best not to let everyone else's reactions be my problem, but that doesn't mean I don't think they're valid or important or worth paying attention to. I know you've got stuff to work through, like Matt does, like Hunk and Lance and everyone else. You feel how you feel, and you get over it how you get over it, and as long as you don't take it out on her it's fine."

"I wouldn't."

"I know."

Keith gives up all pretense of being here to work out and reaches for Hatoko. Shiro thinks, very seriously, about refusing, because he's a little bit addicted to the way she feels in his arms, but Keith isn't as baby-obsessed as the others and when he asks for her it's usually just because he's no good at asking for a hug. He takes her from Shiro gently, careful the way he always is, like he's certain he's going to break her. Shiro worries about Keith having people in his life who get him, who see this part of him and who don't think that means all the other parts of him are just defense mechanisms; when he sees Hunk look at Keith, sometimes, he thinks he doesn't need to worry so much. But Keith's going back out alone - not _alone_ alone, but does he have anyone to see him when he's with the Blades? - and it's almost calming to worry about something as comfortable and familiar as whether enough people love Keith.

"I know you do a lot of undercover shit," Shiro says, watching Keith let Hatoko wrap her little hand around one of his fingers. "Stuff where you have to go dark for a while. But you'll come back from those to so many messages from times I really wanted to tell you something or really needed to know the name of some actor from something stupid it'll drive you up the wall, and you'll drive me up the wall with constant calls when you're not on missions. It won't be radio silence, it won't be - "

Shiro can't say it, which is fine, because Keith probably doesn't want to hear it.

"I know," he says; Shiro's not sure he does, but if he thinks he does that's enough for now. "Antok's taking off in the morning, and I'm gonna be right behind him. You don't have to worry about talking me into not staying, I was never - I have to do this. I just have to make sure, too."

"You've - I like who you've turned into, Keith. I'm proud of you."

Keith turns a little pink, and if it were anyone else Shiro would tease them about it just to lighten the air, give them some space to feel their feelings, but Keith'll panic if he does that so he just lets it hang. Keith stands up and hands Hatoko back to Shiro, rubs at the back of his neck when his hands are free. 

"I'm gonna go train," he says. "Can't let them think I've gotten soft."

Shiro watches him go, his slump-shouldered teenage walk transformed into something tall and solid and determined. When Shiro left for Kerberos, and all he had to think about in long stretches of deep space was almost failing his medical clearance, was the Admiral trying to talk him out of it, was the real possibility they could get stranded or worse, he'd worry about Keith, and who he'd be at the end of three years if he didn't have Shiro. And it was never a real worry, because Keith was always going to become the best version of himself, and so it was safe. Now, sitting on a ship that feels too vulnerable no matter how high its defenses are, facing the realization he might never want to fly solo ever again, holding a baby that makes Pidge anxious and upset too often for either of them to be comfortable with, he's a little grateful for the gift Keith's given him, the gift of the right kind of worry, the safe kind.

Keith's already knocked the head off one dummy when Shiro packs Hatoko up in her carrier and heads back up to the room for a shower; it just makes Shiro feel even better.


	8. Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro doesn't need a new arm, just a new approach.

"The main difference between Galran quintessence and Altean is the extraction method. Galrans want the biggest instant boost, with no real concern for longevity, which is why they're always looking for new sources. Prosthetics like this, that draw quintessence from the body, don't generally pull enough to do harm except in the very long term, but even if you're not in danger this is inefficient and takes much more energy than necessary."

Shiro knows all this is for Pidge, and he's just a teaching tool, but Allura keeps phrasing things like he's part of the conversation and that makes being on an exam table with his arm wired up and someone other than Pidge in control. He still has to focus to keep his breathing calm and even, to not let a little anxiety shift to panic. When Pidge doesn't need to be looking at the screen, though, like right now, she moves to stand closer to him and run her hands through his hair.

"And Alteans take less at a time so it lasts longer?" she asks, scratching his scalp with her blunt nails.

"Sort of. We refine as we draw, for a similar power level but with the excess cycled back into the body. Right now, any excess power is being funneled through the hand when it's activated as a weapon; if we can successfully convert your arm to Altean quintessence, Shiro, you may find it's less powerful a weapon, but you should also be less tired after using it."

"I don't need it to be a good weapon."

"Oh, it will still be good, sorry. But if you insist on manning the Castle rather than flying missions, hopefully you won't need to use it much."

Shiro sighs; he doesn't want to argue this out again, no matter how good Allura's intentions. Shiro's had trouble with open spaces since they got back, anywhere without adequate protection from an ambush, and he's working on it but deep space in anything smaller than the Castle is too much. And as long as Pidge doesn't want Green back - she's taken her flying a few times, but the face she made when Coran suggested Pidge replace him as paladin had Shiro biting back the urge to lunge at him for upsetting her - their options are to leave the Castle floating far away from battles, or for Shiro and Pidge to figure out how to fly it.

"Pidge, I need your eyes," Allura says, and Pidge gives his hair a little tug before walking away. "I believe I've translated the extraction process into the language you've used correctly, but I'm not entirely confident."

Pidge tilts the terminal towards her, and the two of them hunch over it together, making nearly identical squinty-eyed concentration faces. It's cute; he holds on to it while his eyes drift around the room, overlaying the two of them working so hard for him over any view that gives him that little panicky electric shock in his brain. No flashbacks, that's his goal, and he's been successful for almost ten doboshes straight this time. The medical bay on the Castle is, obviously, cold and sterile like pretty much all medical bays everywhere are, but at least it's not all harsh fluorescent purple and he trusts - and adores- the people working on him. It's fine. 

"Shiro," Pidge says, like maybe she's said it a few times; he turns and gives her a weak smile.

"Sorry, what?"

"We're ready to give it a try," Allura says. "It might hurt."

"Oh, I'm really good at hurting," he says; Allura makes that face the others keep making at him, kind of a grimace like she knows he's joking and wants to react with a laugh but can't quite manage. He winks at Pidge and she laughs, at least, his best audience.

"Brace yourself anyway," she says, and Shiro takes a couple deep breaths. He's expecting a more intense version of the uncomfortable buzz of his arm turning on; this isn't that.

"Fuck," he gasps, his whole shoulder lighting up with it. For a tick he thinks if one of them handed him a marker he could map the entire network of wiring inside him, mark everywhere the wires give way to his body, but then it intensifies and if someone asked he's pretty sure he wouldn't be able to tell them where his shoulder even _is_ through the pain. He's dimly aware of movement next to him, and then Pidge is petting him again; he can barely feel it but he's always so grateful.

"How long?" Pidge asks Allura.

"Until the new quintessence fully replaces the old. It shouldn't be more than another dobosh."

Shiro can take a dobosh of this, he could probably take anything for just a dobosh. He grits his teeth and tries to focus on the soothing rhythm of Pidge's hands in his hair. It still fucking hurts but he's adjusting to it, a little, his vision less and less blurry with it, and then it's over. His shoulder throbs all the way to the middle of his chest, deep, bruisey pain setting in to replace the sharp blaze, but when he looks down there aren't any marks.

"Okay?" Allura asks, and Shiro nods, panting a little. "Will you move your arm for me?"

Shiro does, as much as he can, limited by the wires and the ache, waves it around a little and then wiggles his fingers at Allura.

"Excellent. Light up your hand?"

It hurts again when he does, but just a quick flash that disappears almost before he can react. His hand stays its normal dull metal for a tick, two, three, and finally flickers to life, the blue glow such a welcome change he almost cries. Careful, again, not to upset the wires or push himself too hard, he whips it in a little slice through the air, the satisfying hum making him tingle. 

"Good?"

"Great," Shiro says. "It's a little sluggish."

Allura nods and types for a tick. "If it's not bothering you much, I'd like to give it a varga before we adjust. It might just be the quintessence hasn't had a chance to fully circulate. And then we'll need to test Pidge's theory about whether the quintessence will be enough to trick the Castle into letting you pilot."

Shiro sighs; he's tired from getting up with the baby, worn down from a long workout and trying so hard to keep calm while Allura worked, and he's pretty sure even if Pidge is right about the Castle he won't be able to focus enough to make anything work. Or he'll crash them into a moon. But it has to be done; things are building up, something big is coming and he can't be the weak link when it gets here.

"How about we do that tomorrow," Allura says, just a little too gentle; he manages not to argue himself into something he doesn't want to do just out of spite. Pidge starts unhooking him from the hundred or so cables between his arm and the terminal, pokes him in the side when she finishes.

"Go take a nap," she says.

Shiro's never liked napping, and he's bad at it, but he's exhausted enough not to argue. 


	9. Back in the Saddle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pidge can take care of herself. Pidge can take care of herself. Pidge can take care of herself.

Shiro breathes, as much as he can manage, shallow breaths but at least they're steady and even. He should go back up to the bridge if he can't control himself, it's not fair to get Pidge worrying about him when she needs to be at her best. Should, but won't; he can't just send her off without being here.

"Breathe," she says, almost as soon as she steps into the room; the other paladins give them what semblance of space they can, circle around to their ziplines while mostly pretending Shiro and Pidge aren't there. Pidge steps right up into his space, as close as she can with the baby carrier strapped to his chest. Hatoko burbles and coos, reaches for Pidge, does the special baby magic that can calm Shiro down, lift him up, no matter where he is. "You okay?"

"Sorry," he says, instead of an answer.

"You're fine. And we shouldn't need Castle backup, so Coran's ready to talk you through wormholing away if you can't focus." Pidge goes up on her toes, and Shiro bends a little to meet her halfway so she can kiss his cheek. "And I'm going to be fine. Worry about Matt and Hunk, because they're definitely going to pay more attention to protecting me than their own asses."

"I'm still going to worry about you."

"I know," she says. "I'm - I keep thinking all I have to do is say I'm not ready and Coran will run down here and take my place, and that would be so much easier. But I have to do this, I can't keep - I have to."

"Be careful," Shiro says; she doesn't need the warning but she doesn't roll her eyes at him. She shouldn't have to coddle him, she has to do this so much. "Don't get all Pidge about it."

"I'll do my best," she says, laughs a little. It's good, it's good that she's feeling up to flying missions again, good that sitting still is making her antsy, good that her version of getting better is a little easier to see than Shiro's. Even if all she's doing is trying to keep busy so she doesn't have to think, to run away from what Shiro and Hatoko remind her of and all the ways the rest of the team treat her like she's still a weepy mess, it's still good. He doesn't want to stop her or stand in her way or make her second-guess. He just...can't stop seeing all the ways he might lose her. "I love you."

"Yeah," Shiro says, wraps his arms around her because they're long enough he can hug her without squishing the baby. "Love you, too. I - make 'em pay."

Her eyes flash, and for just a second she looks like she used to when she was about to step into the arena, determined and full of fire. She can take care of herself.

Pidge nods, and slips out of his hug, and then she disappears down the zipline to her lion. Shiro stands in the hangar and breathes, and breathes, and breathes, until Coran calls down to let him know he's needed on the bridge.


	10. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith, Matt, and Hunk are always a little clumsy with each other. Must be why they fit so well.

Allura doesn't seem that surprised - doesn't seem to have any reaction at all - when Matt sets his tablet down in the middle of taking notes from Vonka's work and walks out of the room. They need him - _Katie_ needs him - but his tolerance for the inside of that monster's head gets lower every time they do this. Today he found a folder labeled _Misc_ that turned out to be full of notes on little things he'd done above and beyond the fertility work, special requests from Sendak or things he'd just wanted to see if he could do, and he got halfway into a paragraph about _a more pleasing experience for the Champion_ and had to either leave or gouge his eyes out. He's had enough trouble controlling the (unfair, unfair, unfair) anger that bubbles up in him when he looks at Shiro sometimes, no need to make it worse.

He's halfway to Hunk's room when he realizes he hadn't actively decided to go there, but when Keith isn't around to spar it out with him Hunk is the best person for this kind of mood so he just keeps walking. Hunk takes being accessible to the team really seriously, so his door's hardly ever locked, and like usual it opens right up for Matt.

Whoops. Mistake, mistake, abort mission.

Turns out Keith _is_ around, his last Marmora mission must've gone faster than expected. He's here, and he's kneeling between Hunk's legs, and he's stripped down to his tight boxer briefs and there's a smear of come at the edge of his lips, and Hunk is naked and grinning up at him and he looks just _impossibly_ satisfied.

"Shit," Matt says, and they both turn to look at him because why did he say anything out loud, so he just curses again and ducks back into the hall, letting the door slide shut behind him. That open door policy must be kind of a bitch when Hunk's boyfriend is only around once every couple phoebs. Okay. So, he could go to the lab and fiddle with something, but he kind of wants to be around people right now. He can't go to Pidge, he'll get clingy and she hates that, and he can't go to Shiro even if they're apart because he's too raw right now and Shiro'll know he's upset and feel bad and that's no good for all the progress he's making. Allura'll be too nice to him and he doesn't want to interrupt the only one of them actually getting anything done to reverse everything they did to Pidge, and Coran's doing the kind of maintenance he's finicky about and if Matt tries to help he'll just end up doing it wrong and getting kicked out. 

He's pretty sure Lance went planetside, but if he didn't there's like an eighty percent chance he has Hatoko and that's a pretty good bet for getting his mind off things. They can continue their important work developing her fine motor skills by trying to make her use the video game controllers.

"Matt," Keith says, before he gets very far; Matt turns around to see him still in his underwear, always-messy hair even more of a disaster than usual. He's hot, objectively, just enough scars to look dangerous, toned and cut and bulging in his boxers; a lot of people would appreciate this on a lot more levels than just being kind of glad Keith trusts Matt enough to show him this. 

"Uh, hey," he says, rubs at the back of his neck. "Sorry."

"Nah, it was my fault. I wouldn't let him up to lock the door. You okay?"

Matt blinks at him a few times. "Uh, yeah, that was pretty far from the worst thing I've seen."

Keith rolls his eyes. "You looked like you wanted something."

"Oh," he says, "right. Just kind of a rough day, I wanted some company. It's fine, I'll go grab the baby or - "

"Pidge and Shiro took her planetside," Keith says. "Shiro was getting all anxious about her never seeing anything but the inside of a spaceship."

"Is that - " Matt starts, an instinct, a shitty one; it's a stupid question, too, Pidge and Shiro probably went over it in their heads for weeks before deciding it was safe enough.

"It's Olkarion," Keith says, reassuring him anyway. "No Galran attacks for more than a deca-phoeb, and Lance is with them, and there's a couple Blades down there who'll provide extra security if they want it. We can worry when they decide to spend the night down there and forget to tell anyone up here."

"Fair enough."

Keith slips something roughly the size of a pen out of his waistband and hands it to Matt. That's probably weird, and he's probably weird for just grabbing it and putting it to his lips so he can take a few lungfuls of the weird plant Lance discovered a handful of phoebs ago, the one they're all just calling space weed because they're all so creative. The barrel tastes a little salty and Matt tries not to think about it too much.

"Better?" Keith asks, and Matt nods as he blows out a little excess vapor. 

"Yeah," Matt says. "Thanks. I'm just gonna - "

"You can come hang out with us, if you still want," Keith says. "Hunk promised he'd have clothes on by the time we came back."

"Oh," Matt says, already fuzzing a little around the edges. "No, I don't want to interrupt."

"You're not, if we invite you," he says. "And, uh, if you wanted, you could, y'know, join us."

"Oh." Oh. Huh. So he has been reading this right. "I don't, uh, I'm not really - I don't fuck."

Keith shrugs. "Okay. So just hang out, you look like you need it."

Matt takes another hit, probably more than he needs but he just keeps seeing it when he blinks, _a more pleasurable experience for the Champion_ , and he just can't be in his head right now. Or alone, he for sure can't be alone.

"Okay," he says, "if you're sure you don't mind."

Keith doesn't dignify that with a response, just turns back towards Hunk's room. Matt follows him, a little hypnotized by the sway of his hips, the line of his back. So many fewer scars than he probably should have, because the Blades have Galran healing tech and that's 10,000 years more advanced than Altean healing tech and there's no good reason Matt's little sister should look like a pack of wild animals got to her. 

Maybe he wasn't in the right headspace to get high, maybe that was a mistake. Keith tosses a little Kogane special over his shoulder as he opens Hunk's door, his smirk that's supposed to be a smile but only if he likes you enough to smile at you, and Matt definitely doesn't smile back right because Keith's face falls a little. Whoops.

"Sorry, sugar," Keith says as he steps into the room. "No threesome."

" _Keith_ ," Hunk says, "we gotta work on your timing."

Keith shrugs, and steps aside, and Matt's barely in the room before he gets pulled into a Hunk Hug™, big soft arms wrapped around him just a little too tight and his face mashed into Hunk's soft, soft sweater. He melts into it, because it's impossible not to, and Hunk rubs his back and shushes him like he's crying, which almost kind of makes him want to cry. He's not that kind of emotional, though, not right now. It's nice and soothing anyway, though, and Matt has no intention of moving ever again in his life.

"There's brownies," Keith says. Okay. Matt might move, at some point, eventually. Hunk's brownies are legendary. 

"You wanna talk?" Hunk asks. "Or we could listen to Keith tell us about his latest mission until we get bored and fall asleep."

"Wow," Keith says. "That hurts. _Matt_ doesn't think my stories are boring."

"I could - " Matt starts, muffled in Hunk's chest, and Hunk loosens his grip so Matt can shift back a little. "I don't want to ruin your day."

Hunk and Keith both roll their eyes at that, and Hunk tightens his grip so he can lift Matt off the ground, awkwardly walk him the few steps to the bed and drop him on it. He grabs the plate of brownies from Keith's lap, ignores Keith's protest, and holds it out of Matt's reach.

"We want to help," Hunk says. "If you think talking will help, you get a brownie after you talk. Otherwise we can just hang."

Matt sighs. "I was going over the doctor's notes again today."

Keith frowns. "Why are you doing that? You shouldn't have to - you don't have to do that. No one should - who asked you to? I'll - "

"I wanted to be a doctor," Matt says. "I thought, I could be the first person to meet an alien, or I could be the first person to _treat_ an alien, the fuckin' - the Hippocrates of space, you know, the father of xenobiology. And I only got through pre-med, because Kerberos happened, but that's more than anyone else here knows about human medical care. Allura knows her shit but with humans she's just a battlefield medic. I don't want Pidge messed up because someone misunderstood something, and I don't want to have to say to her 'it's too risky, you just have to live like this forever'."

Keith lets out a long, slow breath, and Hunk hands Matt a brownie. He takes the excuse not to talk, and with his head all fuzzy, a little floaty, it's by far the best fucking brownie he's ever had. Hunk sits down next to him on the bed, forcing Matt to scoot closer to Keith, and Keith doesn't move at all so Matt's sandwiched between them, a good solid hug.

"You can help and still not put yourself through this part," Hunk says. "I can help Allura sometimes, or Lance, because all we need to do at this stage is correct her about stuff she thinks humans can do that only Alteans can, right?"

"I need to - I don't _understand_ him," Matt says. "Sendak makes sense, you know? Sadistic, a hedonist, high on his own superiority and anxious about what it means that he admires a couple inferior beings. Everything he gets out of it is right there in what he does. This doctor didn't even - he wasn't having any fun, he was just...doing his job. Just terrorizing her every fucking day, way more often than Sendak did, because his boss said to."

"A week or two after we rescued them," Hunk says, "Pidge came to me because she wanted to talk about this guard she had, wanted to know if she'd had a good quick death. And she was so mad at herself for it she kept yelling at me, for killing her, or for not making her suffer, or not leaving her for Pidge to deal with, because this fucking Galra who was personally responsible for keeping her captive and making sure she went through every shitty thing she was supposed to was just doing her job. It's fucked up."

Matt doesn't have anything to say to that, never really knows what to do when he learns something new Pidge never told him when all he wants is to get jealous and possessive, defend his position as her number one confidante. So he takes another brownie, and stuffs too much of it in his mouth at once, and Keith laughs a little and Hunk throws a big solid arm over his shoulder.

"I'm gonna talk to Kolivan," Keith says. "The Blades might have a doctor we can spare for a little bit, and they might be able to make better sense of everything the doctor did to Pidge."

"The Blades never have anyone they can spare," Matt says.

Keith tips his head back against the wall, sighs a little. "So Kolivan's kind of a dick about humans, and a lot of other species, like most Galra are. I mean, he's better than most, because at least he's like 'these dumb animals deserve to live their dumb animal lives in freedom and peace', but it's still...not great. Except it means when he looks at Shiro and Pidge, mostly what he sees is a couple of kicked puppies, and he's a big softie. The Blades planetside didn't offer to provide extra protection, Kolivan did."

"Does he think you're a werewolf?" Hunk asks. "Half Galra, half puppy?"

"Probably," Keith says. "I'm pretty cute."

"You are," Matt says, and ignores the look they give each other over his head because he's not in any shape to try interpreting it and he wants another brownie. These are probably special welcome back Keith brownies and Matt shouldn't eat them all but also what if he eats them all? That'd be cool.

Hunk drops his arm over Matt's shoulders while he's leaning forward, pulls a little so when he sits back up he tips over against Hunk's side instead of sitting straight back against the wall. Matt pulls his legs up on the bed, awkward because he's too tall and too long, but Keith shifts around to let him get settled, ends up sitting on Matt's feet while Matt leans into Hunk. It can't be comfortable for him but he's nice and warm and Matt's feet are always cold. He's fallen asleep on Keith like this a thousand times, that first phoeb when Pidge and Shiro couldn't be alone together at night because their nightmares would get each other going, the two of them all bony shoulders and elbows and too exhausted to function and passing the baby back and forth, but never with Hunk. Too bad, Hunk's a way better pillow.

"So when you said you don't fuck - "

" _Keith_ ," Hunk says. "Come on."

"No," Matt says, "finish your thought."

"Are you just ace? Or is everything off the table, like romance and junk?"

Matt shrugs, closes his eyes and nestles into Hunk a little more. He's so soft and he smells so good all the time. "I don't know. None of it's important enough to me that I've ever thought about it? I guess I think sex is kind of gross and I don't think, like, kissing and holding hands is."

"Cool," Keith says. Hunk starts playing with the too-long ends of Matt's hair, thick fingers combing it out and getting caught in the mess of split ends. Matt had plans to keep being angry all day but this is way nicer. He can just be warm and chill and a little sleepy and a little confused but kind of in a good way instead. Hunk and Keith take such good care of him, together and on their own, and they never make him feel weird or bad for needing it when he's not the one still recovering from a deca-phoeb in captivity. Or the one who brought the person he loved most in the whole world to space just to lose him, or the one who's carrying everyone else's burdens on his shoulders. So Keith can confuse him all he wants.

"Keith's trying to say we're interested in you," Hunk says.

"Keith was trying to figure out some boundaries before he said that," Keith says, "but yeah."

"I'm pretty interesting," Matt says, and it's funny, because he knows what they're saying but he doesn't know how to process it, and it's funny when he's a little dumb, and he giggles, and it makes Hunk laugh, too, and that's so nice when he can _feel_ and not just hear it. Keith shifts around a little and then there's a blanket over Matt, which is nice because he's always cold. 

"Take a nap," Keith says, a useless order when Matt's already eighty percent asleep but then Keith shifts again and he's stretched out in front of Matt, and Matt throws an arm over his bare hip and snuggles into him before he really thinks about it. Matt should check in, make sure Hunk's actually okay being their pillow, just sitting here for the duration, but Hunk coos a long, sweet _aww_ like he's looking at a pile of puppies instead of an awkward mess of lean limbs, so that's probably fine. 

Matt sighs, and closes his eyes, and falls asleep trying to figure out the right way to say to say _yes, please, this_ , the right way to say _forever_.


End file.
